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Three Steps to Better Self-EsteemBefore you can begin to improve your self-esteem you must first believe that you can change it. Change doesn't necessarily happen quickly or easily, but it can happen. You are not powerless! Once you have accepted, or are at least willing to entertain the possibility that you are not powerless, there are three steps you can take to begin to change your self-esteem:
Step 1: Rebut the Inner CriticThe first important step in improving self-esteem is to begin to challenge the negative messages of the critical inner voice. Here are some typical examples of the inner critic's voice and how you can "rebut" that voice.
Step 2: Practice Self-NurturingRebutting your critical inner voice is an important first step, but it is not enough. Since our self-esteem is in part due to how others have treated us in the past, the second step to more healthy self-esteem is to begin to treat yourself as a worthwhile person. Start to challenge past negative experiences or messages by nurturing and caring for yourself in ways that show that you are valuable, competent, deserving and lovable. There are several components to self-nurturing: Practice Basic Self-Care Get enough sleep, eat in a healthy fashion, get regular exercise, practice good hygiene, and so forth. Plan Fun & Relaxing Things For Yourself You could go to a movie, take a nap, get a massage, plant a garden, buy a pet, learn to meditate-whatever you enjoy. Reward Yourself For Your Accomplishments You could take the night off to celebrate good grades, spend time with a friend, or compliment yourself for making that hard phone call. Remind Yourself of Your Strengths & Achievements One way is to make a list of things you like about yourself. Or keep a 'success' file of awards, certificates and positive letters or citations. Keep mementos of accomplishments you are proud of where you can see them. Forgive Yourself When You Don't Do All You'd Hoped Self-nurturing can be surprisingly hard if you are not used to doing it. Don't be critical of yourself-remember that inner voice!-when you don't do it just right. Self-Nurture Even When You Don't Feel You Deserve It "Fake it" until you can "make it." When you treat yourself like you deserve to feel good and be nurtured, slowly you'll come to believe it. Step 3: Get Help from OthersGetting help from others is often the most important step a person can take to improve his or her self-esteem, but it can also be the most difficult. People with low self-esteem often don't ask for help because they feel they don't deserve it. But since low self-esteem is often caused by how other people treated you in the past, you may need the help of other people in the present to challenge the critical messages that come from negative past experiences. Here are some ways to get help from others: Ask for Support from Friends
Use Hypnotherapy Sometimes low self-esteem can feel so painful or difficult to overcome that the professional help is needed. Using hypnosis and self-hypnosis is a good way to learn more about your self-esteem issues and begin to improve your self-esteem. Send mail to webmaster with questions or comments about this web site. Copyright © 2005-2007 Changing Lanes, LLC. Last Updated 05/08/2007.
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Send mail to webmaster with questions or comments about this web site. www.changing-lanes.com Copyright © 2006-2008 Changing Lanes, LLC - Plymouth, Michigan
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