paradigm coaching

Our stories have a purpose. They help define who we are we don’t feel lost in the world. Living inside them is like being inside of a clear bubble. The thin transparent walls act like walls that trap us inside. Even though we are able to see past these walls at everything that is around us, we stay safely trapped inside. Comforted by the familiar terrain, bound by an inner knowing that we cannot go any further. Our stories separate us and draw a clear line (or boundaries) between ourselves, others, and the world. These walls limit and even shut down our possibilities. Our stories keep us apart even when we are craving a sense of belonging. They drain our vital energy, leaving us tired and often hopeless. The predictability of our stories feeds our resignation and guarantees our fate. When we engage inside our stories, we engage in repetitive habits, abusive behaviors and abrasive internal dialogues causing more fear and resentment towards others and ourselves.

Like all good stories, our personal dramas always have a theme, which it repeats itself over and over again. We can decipher the themes by listening carefully to the conclusions we have made about the events of our lives. These conclusions shape who we become, who we are, and drive our personalities. Our conclusions become our shadow beliefs, the subconscious beliefs that control our thoughts, words and behaviors. They establish our limits. They tell us how much love, happiness, and success we are and are not worthy of. Our shadow beliefs disguise themselves as the truth and rob us of our dreams and our expression of them.

But what’s important to realize is that our shadow beliefs contain the very wisdom we need to transcend our current limitations and our discontent. They motivate us to compensate for our shortcomings and drive us to become the opposite of what we tell ourselves we are and yet they drive us to prove that we are worthy, that we are lovable, and that we are important. Left unattended, these shadow beliefs turn on us, sabotaging the very things we most desire by letting their negative messages limit our lives.

By moving through our tragedies and learning the lessons they have to teach us, we can move into our true selves and experience our greater destinies.

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